Living With Anxiety

It is normal to be nervous. Everyone are also scared before doing this. You just need to take the first step and it will be fine after that.


I hate being told the above lines because for me, it isn’t normal. On most days, I'm in constant fear and worry.


So what is it like to be living with anxiety?



Everyday is an emotional roller coaster

 

Although I mostly appear normal, I can suddenly tear up when anxious thoughts trigger since my mind is in a constant wander.

 

Even the simplest tasks are difficult


Even the simplest daily task of buying food can be difficult. The whole process from ordering, to paying, receiving my food and the seller can make me anxious.


Going out completely drains my energy

 

Whenever I get home from somewhere, I'll need to nap, even if I'm out for only a couple hours. The constant phobia of being surrounded by people is energy draining.


I always have physical cuts


I’ll peel the skin on my fingers or scratch my arms and legs when I feel anxious, resulting in regular abrasions.


Sleep schedule is a mess


As much as I would like to have a regular sleep schedule, it is difficult for me to go to bed and get up at my planned time. The wild mind makes it difficult for me to fall asleep and the anxiety ruins my motivation to get up.



So that's how I'm going about with my emotions everyday. With anxiety, it's more than just feeling jittery before something or taking the first step. What I'm dealing with is an emotional struggle, on a daily basis.

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